Keeping This One Short

Some people say the point of language is communication, and as long as the audience understands, fluency, errors, style, and the like are secondary matters. Suit yourself... As always, these sentences are from student work and my comments are in (     ).

- At first, Lady Macbeth appears as a strong willed, independent woman without a conscious.
- My favorite part of the play was when Lady Macbeth took initiative and made the plan to kill the king. I liked this scene because it showed Lady Macbeth's dominance in the marriage. (Not sure what to say...)
- Looks like it's curtains for Polonius! (Hamlet jokes!)
- Realism extends from the ideas of realism.
- As the story progressives...
- She took many repercussions to ensure that he would not get caught.
- ... his wife killed himself.
- After contemplating his own thoughts... (Is that redundant?)
- In the beginning of the story the narrator was still semi-in the non-mental mindset.
- Hamlet's actions of being noble, honorable, and just is reasonable.
- ... the Virgin Mary is good and riotous. (Maybe she went to Mardi Gras.)
- Hamlet does not cease the moment.
- The setting can be influential to the tone of the character.
- Her character had fully developed into insanity.
- (Said in class.) "High class women look at Motzart."
- His promise doesn't really seem promising.
- The narrator of the story explains her feelings by her actions.
- Every story has a plot and a meaning. (Have you read what passes for modern fiction?)

J.

More Reflectiness

Let me step up on my old soap box for just a second. On their Self-Reflection papers, written at the end of the semester, many of my College English students wrote something like, "This class taught me that I am not as good a writer as I thought I was." Mr. Chaffee says, good! That is the point! It's "College" English, after all, not "High-Level-High-School" English. However, some also griped about their grades. Mr. Chaffee says, that is why we should get rid of grades! The goal of education should be learning, not scoring and ranking. I shall now step off the soap box (thud) and return to your regularly scheduled student sentences. As always, these are from student work and my comments are in (    ).

- They forget to realize the meaning of life. (I hate when I forget that.)
- One reason of his unhappy bits...
- Although the title, "Great," is given to Gatsby by gossip and rumors, although there is.
- Tom and Daisy... show their true colors on how corrupt and carless they are. (No, no, I think they had a car.)
- The sister is at fear with her life.
- Sherlock is brought a case from a woman whose sister had pasted two years before.
- Father Brown is quite a blended man.
- Myrtle lives in a world full of allusions.
- Scott F. Fitzgerald (Syntax you here error have.)
- Daisy knows about the affair that Tom is doing. (Does she know about the Myrtle that Tom is having?)
- The filthy rich use cars as... a symbol of their garnish success.
- ... his wealth came from a long line of pharmaceuticals. (He must have worked for Big Pharma.)
- Ultimately in the end... (You know that's redundant, right?)
- Wilson shot Gatsby before going suicide. (Word. He went all suicide and what not.)
- Slavery was huge in this time period. (As opposed to that time period when it was wee?)
- One example is the position paper and the persuasive paper. (So, two examples?)
- Coarse Reflection Paper (I kept waiting for a dirty joke or ribald story, but no, she just reflected on the course.)
- Selfish is the opposite meaning of selfish. (And dark is the opposite of dark, up is the opposite of up, and true is the opposite of true. Mind blown?)

Here's to the start of a new semester. Until next time...

J

Disappointment

Well, it's been a while. Those of you who know me personally will know why. But I noticed last week that I had a few gems to share and I thought the long weekend might offer an opportunity to post. In January my College English students wrote self-reflection essays. The assignment was to look at the five papers they had written over the course of the fall semester and reflect on what they had learned, how their writing had improved, and what might still need improvement. (Some variation of "Mr. Chaffee is hard on our writing" is a popular comment. The level of bitterness varies.) Anyway, I tell you this because the first sentence below is the title of one of those self-reflection papers. As always, these are from real student work and my comments are in (    ).

- How Disappointed Can I Make Mr. Chaffee This Time?
- There has been recent research that has brought truth to this theory.
- Sexual Education is part of the required curriculum in heath class. (Heath class? Does that have anything to do with Heath Bars? I love those things...)
- Emerson and Thoreau have the same basis idea but some of there other ideas were different.
- Salem witch trials started to get injustice on the "witches."
- He further flaws himself...
- Childhood obesity can lead to health disease. (Sounds serious.)
- Some people think that smoking will make them "cool." Others are just curios and want to try it. (All the curios on my shelf are smokers. Lousy trinkets.)
- Smoking controls their lives and will make it possible to but cigarettes.
- He was overtaken by a carriage with a name by the name of Dr. Richards.
- The mystery trying to be solved... (Deep down, every mystery wants to be solved. It's their hearts' desire.)
- The meaning of Dr. T. J. Eckleburg are known to be like "God."
- People might think that a killer whale in a tank is not a big deal. These people are wrongfully mistaken.
- He was credibly corrupt.
- ...which many people associate guerrilla war with the use of bubby traps.
- Professional (football players) have taken abusing others to far. (A little light abuse is fine; but don't go overboard NFL players.)

One more. If you don't know what passive voice is, this won't make sense. If you do, let the delicious irony drip down your chin.

- I was unaware of passive voice and that it should not be used.

("It should not be used," is in the passive voice.)

J

Give Thanks For the Funny

No intros today, just straight to the fun. As always, these are from student work and my comments are in (    ).

- (Did you like The Crucible?) No, it was confusing and a lot of back and forth talking. (Well, it is a play.)
- Today's society has taken nerds to a different level.
- Her husband is a lone shark. (If he's married he's not lone.)
- She had such low self of steam. (No, I did not make that one up.)
- He helped getting confesses from the people.
- The Crucible is about the Harlem witch trials. (You are a few hundred miles off there.)
- ... the difference in the beliefs of a character from start to finish is different.
- One has often wondered who they really are. (I have a diagnosis!)
- My last experience writing a research paper was in health class. I wrote about herpes and everything that goes with it.
- The difference between how jelly and jam is made is quite different.
- The Crucible, by author Miller... (Well, he was the author...)
- The news spread all across the land just because of the Baleks unhonesty was created.
- Proctor violates the rule Adultery.
- They wouldn't have had the probably with the people getting ripped off.
- ... integrity can also benefit society negatively. (Oh, those negative benefits.)
- This means people have integrity to fix their fate and others in society.
- The story starts out by characterizing the old women as old.

Be back soon,

J

So, September's Almost Over

I realized today I had not posted anything on this blog yet this school year. Well, can't let September end without an update. So, without further ado, to the student writing. As always, my comments are in (    ).

(In answer to the question: Have you ever cheated in school?)
- No, because I don't like to talk to other people.
- Yes I have cause im tired of not doing good in school so I cheated so I could pass
- No, because cheating goes against my code of honor... unless it's a video game.
- Um yes, I cheated on homework before because I forgot to get it done so I felt it okay because I never really cheat on homework. (Except that one time... and that other time...)

- Location is a very important key factor. (Department of Redundancy Department)
- In New York City a medium sized apartment in a decent part of the city can be rented for alkjflajf a month. (I don't know how much that is, but it sounds expensive.)
- Songs can be created by the author in the same way as poems are, but are mostly created with thought sometimes like what is going on in the world and with someone else or the stereotype of what everybody assumes what goes on, or just about having fun. (I got lost a long time ago.)
- Capitalism and Communism were created as an attempt to improve on the same ideals. (Hmmm...)
- Abby wanted to witchcraft to kill Mrs. Proctor.
- (Chillingworth) gets his jollies from torturing Dimmesdale.
- To the town's people it means she could be only one other thing, a devil or a witch. (Not good at Math, are we?)
- She says that she is pregnate.
- Elizabeth is mad because John did adultery.
- He is accused of holding witchcraft.

(Three variations on the seventh commandment.)
- Thow shall not comet adultry.
- Thou shall not adulter.
- Though shall not do adultry.

Until next time.

J

Self Reflection

Long story short, one thing I sometimes do at the end of the school year is ask my students to fill out their own report card. I tell them not to guess at what their final grade for each class will be, but write down what they think they should get for each class and why. It is interesting to read their grades and comments, especially for English. I thought I would share a few of their admittedly general and hasty self reflections and let you draw your own conclusions (though I may toss in a few of mine). For the most part I won't indicate which class they made a comment about, but for a few it is necessary. I'll give you the grade followed by their reasoning, and as always, my comments are in (    ).

- 98: I taught you new vocabulary. When the student becomes the teacher they get a 98. (#1. The "vocabulary" was popular slang with a shelf life, I would guess, of two more weeks. #2. The teacher would like to point out that you used the wrong pronoun; your "they" should be "she." Now who's the teacher?)
- 100: How can I screw up when I never know what's going on?
- 93: essays bring me down bro. (I feel you, dog.)
- 95: I am the only girl in the class and that deserves something.
- 100 (for gym): I can't catch, throw or kick, but I do track, and anyone that actually lives through track deserves a 100.
- 99 (for gym) I try like it's the Olympics but I'm terrible at sports. What I lack in athleticism I make up for in effort.
- C: because I do text in class I do sometimes listen to music but I do pay attention and try to get my work done.
- 89: may not do all work but I try hard. (Is this not a contradiction?)
- D: I don't really try because I don't understand.
- 80: sometimes I zone out.
- 80: I show up most of the time. (There you have it. Showing up most of the time is worth a B minus.)
- 80: this doesn't interest me so I have trouble focusing.
- A minus: I always do my work even when no one else does.
- B plus: I sometimes try but I don't understand it at all.
- B: I barely know what's going on half the time. (Half the time is 50%. Is a B 50% now?)
- C: I never really know what's going on.
- 90: It's easy because all you have to do is listen. (Like being married.)
- 60: I don't understand any of that crap.
- 100 (for "lunch"): eat all food groups.

I did not ask them to grade themselves in "Lunch," but if there were participation grades for lunch most of my students would pass with flying colors. (Pun intended.)

J

Surveying the Year

Every year I give “End-of-the-Year Surveys” to all my students. Their responses are enlightening and often entertaining. The following are responses from students in several different classes, including: English 11, English 11E, Detective Fiction, and College English. The questions will be in bold, responses may come from any or all of the classes, and as always my comments are in (    ).

What was your favorite work we read this year and why?

- The Great Gatsby! I’ve read it before this year and I love it every time I read it.

- Grate Gastbe because there was killing. (Where were you for Hamlet?)

- I suppose I favored The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn because it was the only book that didn’t involve romance or anything of that kind.

- My favorite work this year was The Scarlet Letter, because it made me feel accomplished to have read such a boring and difficult to understand book. (Good for you?)

What was your least favorite work and why?

- all of them, reading sucks. Its lame. (So glad to have you in class.)

- I really, really disliked Ethan Frome. The characters continuously angered me with their foolishness and lustful, wasn’t love, desires. Plus the story was far too dramatic for my liking.

- I think Ethan Frome is a dumb book because people do have choices and are not stuck in one single choice. They can also change their fate. (Take that, Edith Wharton!)

Which of the six papers in English 101 did you enjoy writing the most and why?

- I enjoyed writing the personal narrative because I like to talk about myself so it was easy.

- I enjoyed writing the personal narrative because it is about me. (I see a pattern developing.)

What did you like most about this class?

- My favorite part of English 11 was Mr. Chaffee’s sarcasm.

- the off topic conversations

- I liked our off task talks the most. (It always amazes me that they can’t see the connection between the literature and what they see as “off topic” conversations… even when I spell it our for them!)

What did you like the least?

- When Mr. Chaffee asked me to write in books. (I asked her to make a small pencil mark on one page. She was psychically incapable of doing it.)

(English 11E only) Did you like / dislike the journal writing? Explain.

- I liked the journal writing but if you neglect keeping up on the journals they become a huge burden at 9:00 p.m. the night before they are due.

Do you think you became a better writer in (this class?) Explain.

- Yes. Your very strict criticism helped me plenty. (I do go crazy with the green pen sometimes.)

- Yes, because now I realize if I state something I have to back it up with information.

Did your teacher give enough feedback on papers, etc. Explain.

- Yes, you stated when my writing had no actual point or nothing important in a paragraph.

- Yes. My teacher gave me more than enough feedback. My essays were covered in green writing. (See, crazy with the green pen.)

What did you learn in this class:

- I have learned that Mr. Chaffee is more of a comedian than an English teacher. (Is that a compliment? Didn’t feel like it.)

- always should write a rough draft. (Was this “sentence” just a rough draft? ‘Cuz it’s rough.)

- I learned just how much I wanted to graduate.

- That procrastination is probably the worst possible thing to do.

- Never procrastinate on writing a long paper because it barely ever works out in the end.

- Don’t know, wasn’t really here. (I noticed.)

- Don’t go on a massive killing spree like Hamlet. (You get real-life lessons in English class.)

- Don’t be a kiss ass. (See, life lessons.)

- I’ve learned how to look deeper and see the meaning of a chapter or just overall things in life.

- If we don’t get your references we are all sad people. (Actually it just makes me feel sad… and old.)

- TV isn’t worth watching / Technology has ruined the youth. (I harp on this… a lot.)

- society is a horrible place. (Not sure if it was me or the literature that brought this across. Probably me.)

- Essays are challenging in 11E.

- I learned how to write essays that were somewhat more clear and concise. More like a foggy and silty bucket of water than a mud puddle.

- I learned that conformity is bad and that I am an idiot. (Socrates supposedly said, “I am the wisest man alive, for I know one thing, and that is that I know nothing.” So, you’re in good company.)

- Think deeper, don’t just skim the surface with your writing.

- facts are facts and the truth is the truth.

- Truth and fact are different.

- truth = fact + meaning (More on this later.)

On a scale of one to ten, how hard was this class? Explain.

- 5 because some was hard and challenging but then I was lazy and didn’t do any work.

On a scale of one to ten, I put in this much effort: _____, because:

- 7. It’s my senior year so I’ve been a bit lazy but I also wanted to do well in your class so you would love me.

- 10. I always did my work and I was your favorite.

Do you have any suggestions about how to make (this class) better?

- No Regents Exam. (Amen and hallelujah.)

- More sarcasm! (I’m not sure I can be any more sarcastic.)

- It’s an enjoyable class, not too much work but still makes you think hard. (Again, is that a compliment? Or…)

- Never ask this question again. I don’t like giving suggestions to teachers.

Do you have any further comments on any topic whatsoever?

- I like… Turtles and books. You can never have too many books.

- This doesn’t end this year. Just wait until next year…

- This isn’t the end. (These last two comments, coming from two seniors, seemed ominous.)

- I honestly didn’t put forth great effort and I should of done better. But that pound cake was great! (I made pound cake… long story.)

- Yes

Ok, so the fact vs. truth thing: I am no philosopher, but I tried to get several of my classes to see the distinction between facts and truth. I brought up G. K. Chesterton’s comment that a truth is a fact plus a meaning, as well as Jacques Ellul’s assertion that 2 + 2 = 4 should not be called “true” but rather “accurate.” Math is not truth. I wanted them to see that what is most important is not facts, but how we interpret facts, that we have a sound ability to reason and a philosophy through which we filter facts to arrive at truth. Some of them bought it; some of them did not. But at least it stuck in their minds!

Maybe one more post this summer.

J