Full of sound and fury, signifying nothing

The title of this post is a quote from Macbeth. I choose it because it is appropriate to some of the student sentences contained here, and because most of these sentences come from Macbeth tests. And they think Shakespeare is hard to decipher. As always, these are sentences taken from student work, unedited, with my comments in ( ).

- As he fell, his mind detached itself from his body.

- He is without the idea or romanticizing. (This sounds like a bad translation.)

- Duncan gave Macbeth a higher roll. (I think he laced that roll with something.)

- There are many reasons not to kill the kind.

- William Shake spheres...

- (From the Department of Redundancy Department) ..the desire to want something...

- (Also from the DRD) He does not let it lead to self inflicted suicide.

- Macduff was born by sea section. (It was quite the delivery.)

- The witches told Macbeth what he wanted to hear but not the hole truth.

- My favorite part was when Lady Macbeth died. This is because I don't like her.

- There is overpowering and manipulants. (Have you ever taken manipulants? That's some good stuff.)

- Lady Macbeth's evilness shines through.

- Lady Macbeth did not act lady-like during the play.

- My least favorite part was when Lady Macbeth killed herself because she deserved to be murdered by the Scotlands. (And maybe the Englands too.)

- (One student's reason for not wanting to see the play on stage) I have my own visions of what this play would look like and I don't need some terrible director to ruin my images.

- Macbeth was told to be aware of Macduff. (Don't beware, just be aware.)

Tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow... I grade more papers.

Regents Funnies

Every year in New York state high school juniors take the English Regents exam, a four essay test. The following sentences come from this year's (January) test. These quotes come from essays about public parks, about two pieces of literature that were on the test, and the critical lens essay for which they have to write about things they have read. As always, my comments are in ( ).

- With obesity and such being so popular within the United States... (For some reason students insist on using the word "popular" to mean "common" or "widespread.")
- That is very full of trueness. (If this student was a Stephen Colbert fan he/she would know that the word is "truthiness.")
- Epidemics like heart disease, obesity, hypertension, and diabetes are arousing.
- In urban areas, such as cities... (Department of Redundancy Department strikes again.)
- As long as the earth has been alive...
- Nature is a essential part in a healthy, daily portion of life.
- A park would be vital for all living lives. (To the dead lives parks are not so vital.)
- Public parks should be developed because they do good for people as individuals and they also do good for people as wholes.
- The natural world has fostered the human race since humans were created.
- Public parks make people less likely to sit around all day.
- New York has Grand Central Park. (I've heard it's amazing.)
- ... the boy and the elderly man are not on the same page of understandment. (Neither are the teacher and the student.)
- This passage shows the setting of the boy.
- Imagery is a literary term that is tangible with the senses.
- The speaker is a boy who visits Whales. (The boy in the story was Italian and he took a vacation in Wales.)
- As a married man, John Proctor should not have committed treason. (But it's ok if you're single.)
- The little boy has a very big imagery. (Or else he is just happy to see you.)
- Lenny (from Of Mice and Men) likes girls so he likes to rip their clothes and kind of get with them.
- Once oneself suggests to complicate life, then oneself must be prepared to complicate oneself. (Sounds complicated.)

Next week is winter break for us and I have stacks of papers to grade. Stay tuned.

Jeremiah

Been a While!

I have been so busy I have not had time to post anything recently, but I have been keeping notes none the less. And boy do I have some gems. These are from multiple sources, senior papers, junior papers and tests, etc. As always, these are actual student sentences, unedited, and my comments are in ( ).

- Over time parents are going to have a harder time in controling there childs.
- Some similarities about the passages are that passage one and passage two is the characterization that the parents cared about the child.
- Passage two uses the literary element imagery to show the importance of imagery.
- The father is very admiration to his daughter.
- This leads to a fall sense of security. (As opposed to a winter sense, I guess.)
- ...it became a costume to share a cigarette.
- They asked themselves if it was worth healthy.
- A triangle can also be used to solve for what the area of a triangle is.
- A best friend is someone who universally is awesome. (Agreed!)
- Society told Huck to be "whatever" about slaves. (Ok, whatever.)
- Huck finally catches back up to Jim and hops on his raft while asleep. (I have never been able to hop in my sleep.)
- Pap hearts Huck.
- Pap is also a many head. (This was in a paper, and she actually meant "meany-head.")
- The raciest comets in this book... (The "most racist comments" is what was meant, but I wonder what that comet looks like.)
- Huck must foe-fill his priority.
- Marriage is the last step in a couple's marriage. (You have no idea how many of my students work for the Department of Redundancy Department.)
- There are thirty five states that still participate in death penalty.
- Sex education will provide more information to the students so they will be more aware of the causes of sex. (There is more than one cause of sex?)
- About forty years ago people would look at strip clubs as profound places to go. (Deep?)
- Melanoma can be just as deadly as skin cancer. (I think that's because it IS skin cancer...)
- Alcohol can cause death which is a more serious symptom of drinking.
- Lowering the drinking age might help stop the amount of underage dreaming. (What is the legal dreaming age?)
- Huck has been taught that helping runaway slaves is stealing, which is theft. (And akin to robbery, which is like larceny.)
- Condoms can help teens be successful. (Yes, that was the whole sentence. And I say, much success to you, condom-wearing teens.)
- It's like the saying two right make a wrong.
- Same sex marriage should be aloud. (I disagree. I think same sex marriage should be very quiet.)

That is it for now, but I have another list that came entirely from grading the Regents exams last week, so stay tuned...

Jeremiah

Pre-Holiday Post

So many papers, so little time. Here is a quick post before the holiday season kicks off. As always, all sentences are from student work with no editing by yours truly. My comments are in ( ).

- Mr. Proctor does not like that Mr. Parris preaches bloody damnation which leads him to plow on Sunday which is a sin.

- Sometimes patience is hard to control.

- A crucible is a severe test or a trail.

- Elizabeth Proctor questions John for cheating on her, which testes his patience.

- In order to ski one must have a slop to go down. (I love whooshing down that slop.)

- After one ahs their boots... (I have no idea.)

- Now that I a senior... (You don't write like one.)

- Being a senior is just like a self a steam booster. (Getting this paper back probably took care of that boost.)

- The day to day expectance of women was challenged and became successful.

- In many part of the world...

- The goalie must have a mouth peace. (I hate a goalie without a peaceful mouth.)

- This means doing things such as splits should seem simple over time. (Why would anyone do a split over time?)

- Poe is one of the most badass anti-transcendentalist writers of his age. (No argument here.)

- This is the most truthful truth that many would not admit to being true.

- (Said about Poe.) Life isn't always losing pretty girls.

- Without history there would be no present. (Truer words...)

- For the moist part... ( I wish the rest of this sentence had lived up to its opening.)

- ...the World Trait Centers were bombed.

- Sexism was first created in the mid 1960s. (Wow, it took longer than I thought.)

- Knowledge is what a person makes wants to make it.

- Scientific knowledge needs reasoning and proven.

I have one more. Now, this was on the rough draft of a senior paper. I conference with each student about his or her rough draft. The student who wrote the following sentence was a senior girl. Uncomfortable...

- This means that instead of penetrating the ball the team should pull out and waste time.

Mayday! Mayday!

Fall Fun

Sorry this has taken so long. I have 45 juniors and 45 seniors this year, and the seniors are in a college writing class. So, lots of fun! These are from different sources, from junior Regents review essays and essays on The Crucible and The Scarlet Letter, to senior Personal Narratives and Compare/Contrast essays. As always, all samples taken directly from student work with no significant teacher editing; my comments in ( ).

- Beauty has been around since as far back as the early Greek philosophers. (But no further.)
- I defiantly will work out tomorrow. (I dare you to oppose my work out plan!)
- Computers and their technology keep rising.
- When a person here's the crack of the bat...
- Abby causes the most blame.
- John Proctor had an adultery with Abby.
- He also ended up die from Abby.
- Elizabeth was ferious. (That would be furious.)
- After John continued to fight Abby was just all "Oh you don't mean that" and "I love you" type of attitude.
- Abby envies Elizabeth for being the goody to John Proctor.
- Abby pushes him to replenish the relationship.
- John Proctor upholds a very strong presence in the play.
- Hester was outcasted.
- Dimmesdale should have acted more religious instead of having sex with Hester.
- Now we are able to talk to people face to face, using a computer.
- Her seven children dye at birth. (I wonder what color?)
- ...so they will not die from a painful death.
- I need to work more on the writing having the words flow together better. (You're not kidding.)
- Writing can help reading by you should proof read everything to see if it makes sense or not.
- While my dad packed the can... (She meant "car." I hope.)
- My dad sounded like a broken recorder.
- ...in the comer of my eye...
- They got heaving into alcohol and marijuana.
- We knew they couldn't fallow that.
- Al of a sudden...
- A dynamic character is one who changes their actions or ways of going about events.
- ...who else see saw with the devil. (I have always loved see-sawing with the devil.)

That is it for now. But I will be collecting more than a lot of papers this year, so I hope to have more frequent posts. Hope no one is heaving into alcohol!

Jeremiah

Survey Says!

The following are all taken from my end of the year surveys. I have included the questions to which the students were responding. Some of these I included because I think they are funny. Some I included because I think they are telling. I did not include any of them merely for the sake of stroking my own ego. Ok, maybe that's not entirely true; but even the ones that may seem a little egocentric on my part are still pointed, I think. In any event it's my blog, so I get to write what I want. As always my comments in ( ).

What was your least favorite work we read this year and why?

- My least favorite work was The Crucible because it wasn’t really the type of book that wanted me to read more.
- Chuckleberry Finn because some parts seemed like the author was writing just to make the book longer.

What did you like the most about English this year?
- The talks about the works we read that went off on tangents. (The talks went off on tangents, not the books.)
- The righteous tutelage and many interesting arguments between you and the jar-headed students.
- I liked that we did not watch movies because in every other class we do and they are boring.
- That we had a pretty good teacher that was funny and always honest even if it was mean. (“Pretty good?”)
- Honestly, talking about things that were important but not relevant to class. (Oh, it’s all relevant, baby.)
- (This is from a student in the advanced class.) I like that we are trusted that we will read and do the homework and aren’t badgered about useless busywork.
- (Also an advanced student.) I liked being in a class where number grades didn’t matter as much and where the other students cared about school, at least some.
- I liked how it wasn’t about grades but actually learning.

What did you like the least about English?

- Reading.
- The annoying people we all know of.
- Carrying that fat red book. (The English 11 textbook.)
- Too much talking in class. (She meant she doesn’t like to discuss things.)
- [Name removed] walking in every morning late and interrupting our class.

What are one or two important things you have learned this year in English?
- I need to read more of the assignments, and not fall asleep in class.
- You can almost never win an argument with Mr. Chaffee. (No, it's never; not almost, just never.)
- I’ve learned to think about things a little more & in different ways. (I am always so depressed that few students seem to be challenged to think on a regular basis.)
- If you ever need anything done around here, just say “Chaffee.” (I am not entirely sure this is true.)
- Make sure your drink has a re-sealable lid.
- There is actually some good short stories in the world.
- I’ve learned to think for myself, mostly.
- I should never call a teacher a freak. (Took you this long to learn that?)

On a scale of 1 -10 (1 being “easy”) how hard was this class?
- 1 if you do your work, 10 if you don’t, like me.

Do you have any suggestions about how to make English class better?
- Don’t let girls talk.
- Have a Super Awesome Techno Dance Remix Party next year.
- Have smaller classes so more time can be spent 1 on 1.
- Those who read the book/homework should be the ones to contribute in the class discussion.
- No, because you’re not going to change anything so it doesn’t matter.

True, I don't plan to change much.

Jeremiah

Say What?

All of these sentences are from those "last English paper assignment of the year," when they just don't care anymore. On the plus side, it's comedy gold. The papers are on topics from poetry to Hamlet to novels. As always, my comments are in ( ).

- ...the two girls fall at the feet of the name who has a nice name.
- ...punksuation... (Is that like a comma with a mohawk?)
- What is being imaged in the Poem is talking about a cat.
- She stairs at the wall.
- The Emotion he is showing is complaining.
- e. e. cummings is a modernist poet do to the way he rights.
- The blizard of snow symbolizes coldness. (Deep symbolism there.)
- The last two lines (of the poem "Richard Cory") change the poem from an okay feeling to a deep, dark, undelightful feeling. ("Undelightful" should definitely be a word.)
- In the poem "The river Merchant's wife: A Letter" they use alot of differt things to show what her feels where when her has been left her. (?)
- He shoot him self to so he wouldn't have to go throw the pain.
- In the first stanza of the poem the emotion happy is portrayed. It is about two children, with their innocence playing together.
- Modernist poetry is when a poet writes outside the box.
- This idea is shown throughout the poem in different the literary techniques.
- The loss of a loved one can effect people in two ways. One way is physically / emotionally. The other way is mentally. (What about spiritually / psychologically?)
- What are Modernist? (Good question.)
- Then one day at the end of the poem...
- Although they are not the same there are differences.
- She grew love for him. (Don't over water it.)
- Loss means the condition of being removed by a loved one. (Isn't this the plot of The Godfather?)
- He is rarely never home.
- The setting was Jem and Scout always getting in trouble. (Interesting interpretation of the term "setting.")
- During the Victorian ear...
- The reader can tell that Hamlet has an intense feeling of sexuality built up inside him.
- "Hamlet" by Shakespeare has always been renounced as one of the best plays of all time.
- People love to delve into the meaning behind literary pieces of work. (Yeah, lots of people love that!)
- Gene has lacked the knowledge of knowing what Finny is about.
- Gene is afraid to confess his actions to the boys at Devon and to Finny because he is afraid. (So he is afraid because he is afraid?)
- Ignorance can always cause ignorance to occur.
- John Knowles uses cauterization to show Gene as out-going.

Well, I'm going to try to get some reading done while both my kids are asleep! Next post will be comments from the End of the Year Surveys.

Jeremiah