Playing Detective

I have been teaching Detective Fiction this year. See if you can find the sentences from that class. As always, these are from student work and my comments are in (  ).

- After the fish ran away... (Those were some strange fish.)

- She dreams of being a hero who is coragus and brave.

- Eros usually occurs in the first stages of a romantic relationship between a man and women. (You bet it does.)

- (This was the title of a Definition paper) The Many Meanings and Uses of the Word Screw

- My impressions of (Sherlock) Holmes are that he is observant, intelligent, and slightly crazy.

- In the end life ends. (Forgot to take your Prozac today?)

- The story describes a young women's decent into insanity.

- Elisa only wishes that she wasn't straddled down by her own gender. (Did we read the same story?)

- In a plane the passenger isn't able to change its destination as easily as a driver in their own car.  (Seems self-evident, but thanks for the reminder.)

- "The Yellow Wallpaper" through the dialogue through both the male and female perspective, and through symbolism.

- Her husband prescribed her a lay down cure. (It's the rest cure, but ok.)

- While they are praying the children get a little restless and the grandmother told them to go outside in Spanish. (I can only go outside in English, and sometimes in French.)

- Her future is not so hopefully.

- Sherlock Holmes is very perspective.

- Arthur Conan Doyle has written many stories with the repeating detective, Sherlock Holmes.

My 11E class just finished their magazine projects. As part of them the kids write their own brief "staff member biographies." One of them indicated that this particular student was the real "Most Interesting Man in the World," you know, from the ads. Anyway, he claimed of himself that he "made 'close' count in things other than horseshoes and hand grenades." I wonder if that means if you're close you can now get the cigar.

J

Congratulations

My uncle is a high school librarian in Maine; at least he is for a few more weeks. He will be retiring soon and, I assume, settling down to write a novel. I look forward to reading and editing it. (Bill, if you are reading this, I am serious. What else do we teachers have to do in the summer?) Anyway, congratulations and please, take me with you. To the sentences. As always, these are from student work and my comments are in (   ).

- The social network has become accustomed to a person using it in their everyday routine. (Warning: social networks are now sentient. Fortunately, they are accustomed to us.)
- Analytical righting (The name of the class is Analytical Writing.)
- Macbeth learns that Macduff was not born from a woman but was ripped from his mothers room.
- Lady Macbeth yearns for complete control over the Kingdome. (The former home of the NFL's Seattle Seahawks?)
- ...for all intensive purposes...
- Macbeth, with a little cohesion on his wives part, agrees to kill the king.
- He continues to listen to the three witches who tell the future in a very twisted manor. (It's where they live: Twisted Manor.)
- She also depicts about the blood.
- In the begging... (I have noticed this one a lot lately.)
- When the audience first meets Lady Macbeth she is trying to take away anything that makes her weak, even her feminist side.
- ...they suddenly come a crossed three women.
- The effects of guilt on Lady Macbeth is that she has a guilty conscious. (And her subconscious?)
- The witches helped in the destroyal of Macbeth and his life.
- Lady Macbeth is a very different kind of woman. (That's the understatement of the semester.)
- [The Macbeths] never spend time together in fun and wholesome ways. (They really needed a weekend at the Scottish Spa.)
- I couldn't see a stage production of Macbeth unless it was a Jimmy Neutron rendition of it.

Here's hoping for one more snow day before spring takes hold. It doesn't look promising.

J

Winter...Break...Gasp...

Just a few days until February break. I am very looking forward to it. The halls of the old high school are wearing me out these days. Oddly I think that the lack of snow this winter here in our area has made the students more stir crazy than usual. We have only had one snow day. The skiers and snowboarders haven't been able to hit the slopes as much, and there hasn't been any good sledding or snow ball fight weather. And it just isn't as fun to do doughnuts in the parking lot when there is no ice or snow. Thus I think the upstate New York kids have too much pent up energy this winter. Anyway, on to the fun. As always, these are from student papers and my comments are in (   ).

These first two are from vocabulary quizzes on which the students were to define words as they were used in a poem.
- heaves = throws / pukes (Nope, wrong usage; but good to see you're thinking.)
- debauchee = can't get enough (I think I gave this one partial credit.)

- ...the Salem which trials. (Witch ones?)
- Society judges people on a set of criteria on which to judge people based on what is socially acceptable. (I'll keep that in mind.)
- I have a good morale conscience.
- Some things so beautiful should not be anilized.
- She saw these girls doing witchcraft and witchy like things. (Yeah, they really stepped over the line when they stooped to witchy like things.)
- These two stories have struggles between the color of who they are and where they are at.
- Nearly half of the 19 million new STDs each year are created upon people aged 15 - 24 years old.
- ...a sailor named Jim that happened to be an impalsive alcoholic.
- ...lived a seldom life.
- Banquo gets supuisus that Macbeth killed the king.
- There are more job opportunities if you have fluency in multiple languages, especially Spanish, English, and France. (And which are you fluent in?)
- One of the most famous detective fiction writers was Edger Allen Po. (Come on, his name is right there on the cover of the book!)
- He was at the begging of his manhood. (I think we've all been there, right guys?)

Until next time,

J

January Blahs

I understand that for some people homophones are confusing; you know: two, to, and too, or their, there, and they're. I have made those errors myself at times. But I have never understood people confusing "since" and "sense." They aren't homophones unless you mispronounce one of the two words. Anybody know what regional accent pronounces "since" as "sense?" Must be around here, because my students make this mistake on occasion. Anyway... as always, these are from actual student work and my comments are in (   ).

- Huck humbles himself up and apologizes.

- ... teen behavior is different upon good and bad aspects of teen life. (I'll take your word for it.)

- Sense the economy is so bad inflammation has gone up. (You got that right!)

- Google began the project by searching for world renounced engineers. (They wanted the best of the worst?)

- Jim's character is developed majorly through the novel. (I can't believe spell-check had nothing to say about that one.)

- The crime or problem that Holmes is trying to solve is which they don't yet know that the true crime that has been committed. (I am teaching a detective fiction class; I need one to figure out this sentence.)

- She sleep through the hole night.

- The RJ Reynolds Tobacco Company was band from TV advertising.

- Huck makes the ultimate decision on wither to save Jim.

- Huck learns that Jim has feelings that can be hurt when he realizes that his feelings can be hurt.

- As the novel progressives...

- As their friendship strengtheneds...

- TIG welding requires good hand I coordination.

- Today Americans have extremely busy and up pace lives.

- From begging to end...

- Back up cameras on cars can be very helpful for drivers that have a hard time parrell parking.

- Today has grown...

- People feel that women in college are being taken advantage of because of their financial venerability.

- Say you are with a person that bananas are usually yellow. (I'll say it, but it still won't make sense.)

- Sanity is the state of being sane. (Redundancy is the state of being redundant.)

Good times!

J

Sigh

Overheard in my classroom this week: "Those shoes, they make my life!" What a sad little life. Anyway, on to the sentences. As always these are from student papers and my comments are in (   ).

- Responsibility is slowly beat into a person at first by their parents. (Nice childhood?)
- By witnessing situations, the appropriate emotions towards it can be achieved.
- ...aliveness...
- ...running umuck...
- Huck Finn is fighting his conscious.
- (In answer to a question: What do you make of...?) My make is...
- The answer to this was a unaimoyous yes.
- Is procrastination really so bad that a "cure" must be found with great haste? (Nah. We can put it off.)
- Everyone knows that not every everyone...
- Volunteers acquire the benefits of feeling good about helping.
- Higher unemployment rates contribute to weekend infrastructures.
- Throughout the United States, child behavior is varied upon good and bad aspects of teen life.
- Before welding was invented people could not bond two pieces of mettle together.
- I would like to know why it is suck a growing problem.
- Some men travel to foreign countries, such as Africa. (Not a country, dear.)
- She said that Angles came down and talked to her.

Merry Holidays

J

No Joke

I have nothing but the sentences today.  If I start a rant, I may never stop.  To the funny.  As always, my comments are in (   ).

- This can be done by doing various thinks.
- Things are becoming harder to be around.  (I agree, most "things" are.)
- Mr. Tregennis is a farfetched man.
- Starting off in the begging...
- At first the mother was heard of striking the oldest boy who is from Mr. Ferguson's first marriage with a stick.  (He married a stick... and had a son?)
- The child has a severe back impediment.
- ...they feel unconfident.
- He taked a fake one.
- When a person talks another person down to a person's low...
- Ligeia like takes over her, kinda, sorta thing.
- A girl dies. It's Poe.
- She received two human ears in the mail and that is strange because she rarely gets mail.  (Yeah, that's what is strange.)
- A little mystery is beneficial for a detective story.  (One might say even necessary?)
- ...they were facing face to face.
- ...he does not overlook or underlook anything.
- Summarizing is a summary of a paragraph.  (Yup, true.)
- Youth has traditionally been referred to as a point in time when one is young, or youthful.  (Thanks for clearing that up.)

That's all folks.

J

On "Remediation"

A brief note about "remediation."  I teach a class called AIS; it is strictly for students who (a) failed the Regents exam, or (b) are at risk to fail it.  It is supposed to be a sort of remedial class so they can all pass the state test.  Anyway, long story short, I was having them practice a skill they will need for the test - the ability to interpret a one sentence quasi-philosophical quote - by having them look at about ten or twelve quotes from my favorite writer, G.K. Chesterton.  In one period we only really discussed two quotes; but we did also discuss the mathematical term "tangent;" the metaphorical phrase "going off on a tangent;" some of the moral prohibitions of Islam, Christianity, Mormonism, and Judaism; the idea that humans have a body, a mind, and a soul; and we were apparently (some of us) surprised to have found out that Mormons are nice people.  How's that for remediation?
To the sentences.  As always, these are from student papers and my comments are in (   ).

- John Proctor continually downgrades Abigail.  (Yup; now she's flying coach.)
- Sometimes I get a little off track with my message sometimes.
- At times I feel that if I am confused about what to write.  (Like right now?)
- The (hiking) trails are hard to wonder off of.
- Elizabeth also doesn't want to be the blame that he'll look down upon.
- This will increase ones chances of getting bake to the car by dark.
- Once observation I have looking at the picture in more detail...
- People were dyeing...
- Western saddles provide realisticness to these movies.  (Really, spell check didn't say anything about that one?)
- The fighting was hand to hand to hand combat.  (Sounds confusing.)
- Throughout Henry's journey of running away he met a lot of new faces, even some he already knew.
- He say Mary and her lover in a cab some where so he fallowed then.  (That should be saw, followed, and them; just so we're clear.)
- While fishing the worst that could happen is the fisherman drowns.  (Is that all?  I should take up fishing!)
- Once my father was supposed to be watching me and he fell asleep, and I went out to the front lawn and relieved myself because I had seen him do it and thought it was acceptable behavior.  (I bet you don't ask your dad to read your papers, do you?)

Until next time...
J